My marriage is ending

[DOUGIESTYL]

It's for my own well- being. I told her I don't feel loved. She's unwilling and/ or unable to address and solve personal issues that are important to me, and the same is true of me.
We've been together for 6.5 years, and our 4th anniverasry is June 5th.
It's a decision that has torn me apart, cause she's a part of me, and my primary purpose in life for the last 6.5 years has been to give her a reason to smile. Now I'm regretfully making a decision that will cause her an unbelievable pain! It hurts me to do it. I truly care about her, but I know I'm better off without her.
Damn it's hard to finally say "I'm not willing to give it a chance" when there's so much invested.
I'm scared of what life is gonna be like now.
I moved to Ohio for the sake of my love for her, and now I'm here alone, with no family, and only a few acquiantances. I've been through some tough times and I'll make it. It's just a lil scary.
Thanks for your support!

[03zx2]

damn that sucks.Just take your time and enjoy life.

[TSmiley98]

do you have kids? either way split nicely, if she makes more $$ get alimony, and move back home ..

[freaktractor]

i feel for ya bro

[tre2000zx2]

sorry to hear that
sometimes you just have to move on though .. sure it was a hard conclusion to come to..

[WillZX2]

So sorry to hear this dude, best of luck.

[slammmed]

best of luck but have you tried counseling? while we don;t know the story of the personal problems I'd imagine counseling is at least worth a shot, it'd be a shame to throw away 6.5 years of your life. You two obviously made it past the obligatory 1 year mark and had something so try and work it out.

then again i'm a till death do you part thing so take it as you may. either way best of luck.

[ZX2guy19]

Doug you aren't alone man. You live 2 minutes from me if you need something man. You'll find someone else the way you are ;]

It is for the better man, the only thing I heard about her was she was a bitch, so maybe you are better off without her.

Let me know if you need anything man!

[2000zx2chik]

That sucks. Sorry to hear about this man. If your open to suggestions, I would suggest counseling or a trial seperation. I know for myself anyways that when my relationship gets that bad I have left and stayed with a friend for about a month adn that actually helped alot. But I hope everything works out for you.

P.S. Baltimore has the hottest chicks!!

[younglink309]

*huggles*

Everywhere I turn I see marriages ending...

It's really discouraging...

I wish you the best of luck, man.

PROTIP: don't get remarried to the 1st bitch that'll let you in her pants. That's what my father did and now he's seriously screwed... can't even get a divorce easily because of all the stuff he bought for her, then put in her name...

[ChillinZX]

Chicago, land of single hot women... everywhere.

[Zx2 Frost]

Excuse me, Ohio has the hotties.

[scort2498]

nope chi town... im gonna be there for a week this summer...
we all might have to meet up.

is there a reason why ur feeling unloved???
if you know she is going to be in a great deal of pain she obviously loves you...

[Mike]

Damn man that is horrible to hear.

I'm sure you might have thought of counseling or something of that nature, and you might have thought it wouldn't solve the problems. If not...you may want to think about atleast trying.


I've been divorced, but for me it was alittle different, but still non the less a divorce. It can get messy and crazy, but for the sake of both of you even if children aren't involved, try to go about this in a civil manner. It just goes smoother that way.

Hope everything turns out better for ya man. Just keep ya head up.

[The Dad]

I feel for you. I was married to my ex for 2 yrs, 2 months, 18 days, 19 1/2 hours (give or take a few minutes) and don't regret that I left her. If it wasn't for her, things wouldn't have fallen into place and I wouldn't have met my current (and last) wife. You may want to look into the reason(s) why you don’t feel loved. Are there underlying reasons besides her? Can you work at it together (with proper counseling)? If not, the only advice I can give you is not to get "back in the game" for at least 3 to 6 months. Do not get heavily involved with anyone for at least a year, and by all means talk it out with your friends, a counselor or your clergyman/priest. If you ever just want to have a beer drop me an IM, I’m in your area.

[DOUGIESTYL]

Thanks for your wishes, all. It looks like it's gonna work out. I'll keep ya posted. I gotta leave for work, now. I'll post more this eve.

[powder]

I just simply don't understand. If you love her you don't settle for that. If she loves you and is going to be in emotional pain, you don't leave her like that. There is no "enough is enough" imo when it comes to love.

It's good you feel comfortable w/ us enough to tell us about this, but i just don't agree w/ divorce unless it's a cheating or abusive situation. You relocated your life for her, and you're not willing to work through hard times? Whatever happened to TILL DEATH DO US PART?

[DOUGIESTYL]

Powder, that's the biggest part of this kick-in-the-nuts feeling that I'm exeriencing! I totally agree.
My grandfather (GOD rest his soul) was and will always be, my hero. One day he and I were walking, and he stopped. He told me, "You know me and your grandma been married for 52 years?"
I said, "Yessir I know."
He said "You know she's the only woman I 've ever made love with?"
WOW

My wife once asked me why I don't want to make love as much anymore (she expresses "intimacy" in this form). I explained that if I told her she could go buy any pair of shoes, that she could buy fendii, prada, gucci, whatever, but she had to wear them for the rest of her life. Would those shoes get so familiar, that those once high-dollar, trendy, comfortable shoes wouldn't be desirable.
Our love life has been damn-near non-existent for along time. That is NOT the reason I want this divorce, but it's pretty high on the list! I've been walkin with a blowed-out flip-flop all along...

Sex aside- there are alot of serious issues like health, control, personal interests (she HATES my baby, tha Z btw), priorities, finances, kitchen skills, and on, and on.

Philosophically speaking, though, could your question "What ever happened to 'TIL DEATH DO US PART'?", be answered by saying that maybe, just maybe, we made a mistake?
I mean it seemed "right", at the time. Maybe the definition of LOVE isn't the same for, or known, or even "felt" by everyone.

[DOUGIESTYL]

Also, My 14K wedding ring is rhe only piece of gold that has ever tarnished on my skin. I own and wear a decent bit of gold jewelry, too.

[inis]

Also, My 14K wedding ring is rhe only piece of gold that has ever tarnished on my skin. I own and wear a decent bit of gold jewelry, too.

thats a divorce calling right there.

[JenzZx2]

My wife once asked me why I don't want to make love as much anymore (she expresses "intimacy" in this form). I explained that if I told her she could go buy any pair of shoes, that she could buy fendii, prada, gucci, whatever, but she had to wear them for the rest of her life. Would those shoes get so familiar, that those once high-dollar, trendy, comfortable shoes wouldn't be desirable.
Our love life has been damn-near non-existent for along time. That is NOT the reason I want this divorce, but it's pretty high on the list! I've been walkin with a blowed-out flip-flop all along...

Sex aside- there are alot of serious issues like health, control, personal interests (she HATES my baby, tha Z btw), priorities, finances, kitchen skills, and on, and on.

Philosophically speaking, though, could your question "What ever happened to 'TIL DEATH DO US PART'?", be answered by saying that maybe, just maybe, we made a mistake?
I mean it seemed "right", at the time. Maybe the definition of LOVE isn't the same for, or known, or even "felt" by everyone.

I'm a little confused. She asks why YOU don't want to have sex more often, you compare her to a pair of shoes, then you are not satisfied because there's not enough sex? What did I miss?

Car trumps wife? Kitchen skills???? What, is this 1950??

I'm certainly not anybody's side, but am another 'til death do us parter.. I understand some cases divorce is the best solution, but not without fighting like hell first. Counseling would be the first step, either together or individually. I don't know her, and I only know you from what you posted in this thread, but you sound pretty selfish to me, and that will never work in a marriage unless one of you is too stupid to know better.

I'm sure we can all look to find things that we don't like, or frustrates us about our partner, everybody has their quirks, and it's about finding the person who's quirks you can live with.

I'm so glad I married my husband who appreciates the things that I do, looks past the things that I can't and supports me in the things that I attempt. I guess I'll keep him, even though he has no directional sense and makes some pretty disgusting noises.

[chasingsafety]

Regardless of the choice you make, I feel for you, because this is not going to be easy for you, but it sounds to me, like you are just getting bored of her

[Beodude123]

I'm sure we can all look to find things that we don't like,

Gwahahaha I tried to post them all, but Firefox wouldn't let me, there were too many characters.



I'm so glad I married my husband who ... makes some pretty disgusting noises.


Whatever dude, you've got some weird stuff eeking out of your crevices at times too. Don't play the lady on this one. LoL

[JenzZx2]

Quit thread jacking Drew :)